The Fucking Ex-Factor

*I meant to upload this yesterday but at Jock’s house, I have no internet!*

Wow things have been mighty quiet from my end recently. My relationship has been going along swimmingly with Jock. We’ve now been together a whole eight months now (in two days time) although sometimes it feels like we’ve been together for years already, we know each other so well. I’ve been working too many hours on top of accepting too many writing projects… I’ve been swamped between trying to earn money, see my better half and hang out with the Bestie. I still haven’t moved house yet. I’m halfway there though…

Well, the first bit of exciting news to tell you is that I’m quitting my day job this year to become a full time writer. I’m super excited about this. I’m only twenty-something so if it doesn’t go to plan, I’m young enough to still find another job. However, the two websites that I started with the work colleague are nicely making me money and it would seem that between those two websites and my writing earnings, I’m making more money than my day job… It just makes perfect sense, doesn’t it? Lady of leisure, working in my pyjamas, staying in bed all day…. I know it won’t be like that, of course, but it sure does seem appealing! If there are any full time writers reading this, any advice would be HUGELY and MASSIVELY appreciated!!!

My relationship, as I mentioned, is going well but we have recently had a couple of bumps. The money issue is still a problem but I’m earning quite a bit now so paying for more stuff isn’t really bugging me. The biggest problem we’ve faced is the ex. Oh yes, the ex-factor. Don’t you just love it?

Every time I’m with him she’s on the phone or messaging him in one way or another. This time, I surprised Jock on Saturday by saying that he could come get me. I have a few days off and even though he’s at work, I could write during the day at his and spend time with him in the evenings. He loved the surprise as I only sprung it on him Saturday afternoon, and he came and picked me up.

We spent a quiet night together; he was tired and it was nice to just chill out. No sex though. Clearly this annoyed me.

It was last night, Sunday night, that things got shitty. The ex clicked her fingers, messaged him and written a snotty note on a photo that he had recently posted on Facebook… The (step-)daughter misses him. He told me that he was going to go see her when he finished work. Right Jock… so I surprise you with a sneaky visit, I didn’t get laid and now, you’re finishing at 6pm, getting to hers at about 7pm, perhaps even later, seeing the kid for a couple of hours and then coming home about 9/10m ish, at which point you’ll need to go to bed as you gotta get up at 5am.

What was the point in me coming?

The fight commenced. I was quiet (and high) when he got home and didn’t say much. I didn’t want to have a fight with him when he had just gotten home from a long day. He had finished work early to go and see the kid but conveniently, the ex had taken her out for dinner so he STILL couldn’t see her until much later than they had originally planned anyway! I have a serious issue with this bitch now. She is seriously starting to fuck up my life.

Every time I’m with him, something is happening. The last time I saw him, the dog was dying and he would need to console the kid and take the dog to the vet because the ex wouldn’t be able to do it. That dog still hasn’t died by the way, and this was a couple of weeks ago.

Before that, she needed to see him to tell him that there was a rumour going around that me and him had stated sleeping together before they even broke up. Firstly, they had been split up for almost a year before Jock and I got together. Secondly, why does it even matter? We’ve been together for eight months now. They were broken up for a year or so before that. 18 months later and she’s still talking about it? And worse; listening to rumours. We hadn’t even met when they were together. Stupid bitch. Stupid rumours.

The time before that, it was about a car that had been left at the Redneck’s house, which is where Jock lives. I’m pretty sure I mentioned this before so I won’t repeat myself.

She’s ALWAYS around in one way or another, and the way that she talks to Jock is disgusting and disrespectful. In fact, the way she is with him in general is disgusting and disrespectful. Bitch.

Last night, I let rip at him. He told me the reason he HAD to go see her last night was because he didn’t see her on his last set of days off because I was around. Fuck right off! On his birthday back in December, I FORCED him to go and see the fucking kid. He knows I have no problems with him going to see her. I have never, ever made an issue out of it. I would rather he went to see her on his days off when we have more than a couple of hours together in the first place! Fucking moron. He told me before that he struggles to find the time to go and see her which is bullshit. If he really wanted to see her, he would make time. I make time for him in my busy schedule. That’s a cop out as far as I am concerned.

I told him that my problem has NEVER EVER been with his daughter, or seeing her; it’s about the ex… The fact that I don’t see why they aren’t together still if she still has that much of a hold on him. He explained that he needed to keep her sweet because the kid isn’t his biological child and the ex could cut him out at any moment. This point has already been proven – she has threatened to do this once before and didn’t have the balls to go through with it. She’s full of shit and hot air.

The ex recently got engaged to her new guy and Jock is worried that said new guy will become the kids new “Dad”. Pffft.

It’s just bullshit after bullshit and I’m starting to wonder why he keeps defending her. She’s like it with everyone. It’s not personal to him. If he doesn’t take it personally, why should I? Firstly, if it’s okay for Jock to go “silverback-gorilla” every time another guy so much as glances in my direction, it’s okay for me to have an issue with the bitch that broke his heart but still can’t seem to let him go.

I don’t get why I have such an issue with this bitch. I don’t think it’s jealousy. She’s nothing compared to me and I know it. Yeah she’s a tattoo artist and cool but she’s a bitch with an attitude problem. I’m sure even Jock can see that. I make him happier than he’s ever been before – it’s not just Jock that has told me that. I think the problem is the fact that I can’t deal with coming THIRD in his life between the kid and the ex. I can deal with the kid. It’s never been about her at all. It’s the ex. She shouldn’t still have this much of a hold over him.

So that’s where we are. He’s still at work and the fighting and angry messages are still flowing. One thing is for sure, I’m not staying tonight like I was going to. He hasn’t touched me for two nights. I’m not spending a second night on the couch, or a third night not feeling like I should be here.

Fuck the fucking ex-factor.